Chicken Liar

Just to be clear, no chickens were lied to in the creating of this post 

A couple of weeks ago, I got to tick another item off  my bucket list. I went to see a my first ever Burlesque show with The Lovely Sabs, Navjit and Side-Eye. I was aware it involved half naked ladies, emanating confidence, whilst busting a move, but had little other insight. After getting lost walking in a circle around Leadenhall Market (only to find out that the place we we’re looking for was pretty much where we started off) we ended up at Grace hall. We were greeted by long red velvet curtains and 2 rather eccentric,  ladies, who were so bright & bubbly they could have made the Grinch smile at the beginning of the film. As we entered we had unicorn dust sprinkled in our hair - which is apparently the new hand stamp and escorted down to bar area to wait until the doors to the main event opened.


You can purchase tickets ranging from standing to VIP Ringside. Our group, went for the VIP show tickets, which for £22 included -  a table just for our group, with a good view of the stage and our own waiter service. We got a lovely waitress, whom when I asked if the popcorn was salty or sweet replied... “Neither”. She advised that one was chicken and one was olive. Consider my mind blow. I mean I’m a huge fan of Walkers Sensations Roast Chicken & Thyme, but chicken flavoured popcorn ......hello 2019. Turns out,  I was wrong about that. The popcorn actually came with pieces of shredded chicken on it, which to me was still worth sampling, so I ordered some. 10 minutes into waiting for my chicken popcorn to arrive, I was given the displeasing news that they were out of chicken and therefore my order had to be cancelled. Now facing the prospect of getting lightly salted popcorn without chicken, I decided that our waitress would now be referred to as  “Chicken Liar”  Which after a bottle of Prosecco is funnier than it may sound. However after 2 bottles and telling her that’s what I'd renamed her, it was hilarious. Especially as she was such a good sport and not only found it funny AF, she agreed based on the lack of chicken for my popcorn that she would indeed  carry the name for the night.

So I settled down with my salty popcorn and  Side Eye ordered her favourite - A cheese platter. Bless her, this girl is never happier than when there's a cheese platter parked in front of her. So with snacks and alcohol at the ready, we were prepared for the show to begin. Now I’m not going to give you a play by play of what happened, you need to see a show first hand to truly enjoy and appreciate it, but I will share a few things that would encourage me to see another show and maybe even take a class.

Highs

• Energetic - The MC  gave so much animation to her performance, that she held the audiences attention the whole way through 

• Dancers - Its not just  women getting up on stage and shaking ass's in their underwear. Some of the moves preformed required the skill and flexibility that goals are made of

• Confidence - There were women of different shapes and sizes, proving sexiness has now boundaries and does not conform to one look. They all wore their confidence, better than their nipple tassels.

• Entertaining - The moves, the lights, the outfits, the performances - all great

Lows

• There weren’t any lows to speak of, however there was a part of one of the acts where one of the ladies pulled a condom through her nose and out of her mouth - I’m in no hurry to see that again. Despite that, this is still a great way to spend girls night or even date night

So my month was off to a good start. Fast forward 72 hours, to me being told by my doctor, that the antibiotics had in fact, not worked and that I needed to head to the hospital as surgery was Inevitable. Considering I’d been in pain for 36 hours prior to this conversation as the abscess had started swelling again, I’d made peace with it, by the time  pre-surgeon had confirmed it would be happening the next day. So after being knocked out for a couple of hours, and waking up to an IV of Fentanyl, surgery was a success and I’m now housebound for at least the next few weeks, whilst I recover, with my only outings being to the GP to endure the whole packing re-packing saga. Thankfully Santa dropped off an early Christmas present in the form of Dihydrocodeine - Which FYI makes you  drowsy as fuck, so I wouldn't suggest taking it for long periods of time  - Especially as you cannot drink whilst taking them. 

I'm disappointed that I'm missing being able to socialise for the most wonderful time of the year, as well as the Starbucks eggnog latte and seeing Frozen 2 in the Cinema (although I did consider buying 2 tickets for a sofa at Everyman so I could lie down to watch it). But its dealing with the feeling of Isolation that's been the biggest challenge. My friends and Family have been great, but being stuck at home for the majority of the day everyday, not even able to sit has been a little hard to deal with. So I'm working on ways to keep my spirits up.  I'm working from home and trying to watch a new Christmas film everyday. Today I watched Rise of The Guardians - LOVE IT. Getting this post out is a reminder that having more time on my hands doesn't have to be all bad. Yes, its difficult, especially for me, who is so used to being around people, but its also helped me to see it from the perspective of other people that may be housebound or just on their own at this time of year or always. I love Christmas and I'm grateful I have family and friends to spend at least parts of it with. But for some people, this is the hardest time of the year. So I want to send out some some Christmas Love to anyone who may be feeling a little extra lonely right now, or anyone that is struggling to deal with life at the moment. My Christmas wish is that you get through it and don't lose your smile 💝

I'm off to continue my Annual  Harry Potter marathon - because whats Christmas time without Harry Potter?

Have a great day, remember you are a unicorn and don't let anybody shit on your rainbow💖

An Antibiotic Affair

So as the title of today’s post would suggest, I spent last week chomping down on a cocktail of Metronidazole and Clarithromycin 🙄

Photo by analuisa gamboa on Unsplash

Contrary, to how I thought my week would go after surviving what felt like the plague, but was obviously only a viral infection, I’ve been stuck at home in pain thanks to an infected Pilondial abscess. To say that I’m not impressed is am understatement. Mainly, because I don't want another encounter of the surgery I had last year to get it drained.

The surgery itself wasn't a problem. It was my first time under general anaesthetic and I was fascinated by the fact that one minute, I was lying on my side, outside the operating room, with the anaesthesiologist stroking my hand as I counted back from 10 and the next, I was waking up in the recovery room, with a nurse calming me down whilst removing the breathing tube from my mouth. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that there was 2 hour window of my life, I knew absolutely nothing about. All I knew, is that I went in, in pain and came out not in pain. Now, that was partially due to having the abscess drained and partially due to the shit load of morphine they had flowing into my blood stream. Needless to say I could lie on my back for the first time in over 2 week. So I was a happy bunny.

That happiness came to an abrupt end 2 days later, when I had my first experience of  having my wound re-packed. Yes, you read that correctly RE-PACKED. Now bearing in mind, the doctors had explained before surgery, that they would be leaving the wound open to heal from the inside out to avoid further infection. However, there is no explanation on the planet, that can prepare your for the pain inflicted, whilst the nurse proceeded (not her fault BTW), to take out the cotton wool-like material that had been stuffed in my wound in surgery, to then clean it and then re-stuff it. Needless to say, I screamed the hospital down like a newborn, and was reduced to tears once she had finished. Upon leaving the hospital feeling traumatised, it dawned on me that I was about to go through that everyday for at least the next 4 weeks. Cue the tears again.

Even with codeine, those first 2 weeks we're torture. After that, I started  getting used to this invasion  of my body as the wound got smaller and it became less painful. By the time a month had gone by I was down to every other day and then 3 weeks later, it had completely closed. There was no better words uttered, than when the nurse said  “You no longer need to come back" I literally could've kissed her.

With that being said, I still wasn't able to sit for long periods of time, so it was another couple of weeks before I could return to the office to work. Which I was grateful for, as working lying down, is doable, but an inconvenience, as you have to keep switching sides to avoid dead leg, and I couldn't just roll over. I also couldn’t lie on my tummy for too long, as my neck would start to ache. Something I've been reminded of this past week.

Therefore having experienced all of the above, on Sunday night (after rolling over in pain and screaming the house down) I felt a sense of dread at the thought of going through that ordeal again, only 15 months later. Determined to avoid that, I got on the phone to the GP to get an appointment ASAP. Thankfully I got seen Monday morning, to which the doctor advised that it was infected, but it looked like it may have been caught in time and Antibiotics should.....be able to help. He did feel the need to point out, that if they didn’t work, I'd be facing another trip to the hospital to lose another 2 hour window of my life. To which I promptly advised him, to give me every type of drug he could prescribe to avoid that. He laughed.... I did not! He then went on to prescribe me,  Clarithromycin 500mg and Metronidazole 400mg for 7 days. The latter you cannot drink with, which is ironic, because if there is ever a time I'd  wanted a drink, it's whilst waiting to see if the antibiotics would do a superman and fight the infection so that I could avoid a second butt hole again.

Now, you all know how I feel about jinxing shit, but......it would appear, that I may have swerved another opportunity to rock for that beautiful hospital gown, material underwear and compression socks. I'm still not able to completely sit upright, but I am getting there. The protruding lump at the top of my butt crack has shrunken immensely. So shout-out to Sir Alexander Fleming - who Google says invented antibiotics. 

There is the possibility it will burst on its own over the next few days as I have come to the end of the course - which as gross as it sounds, would be helpful as any infection or pus still in the wound, would swiftly vacate my body. But if not, I'll still take it as a good sign that its all cleared and should start to be able to sit for longer periods of time. 

Canadian Breakfast

Hot Chocolate 

I tried testing my ability to to sit today, when I went for brunch, with my  lovely neighbors at Forks & Green. Unfortunately, after a couple of hours, I was back in discomfort. This should subside over the next week though...again, fingers crossed



Thus, my hopes for this week are that this abscess malarky is over and done with, so I can get back to a normal life of yoga, working out (being confined to my house all week, taking antibiotics has seen me eating for comfort rather than survival, leading to an expanded mid-section) and getting back to the office (its funny how you miss being around other people, when you can't) 

I did however, get out yesterday to do half of walk the walk. Nothing like not being able to sit and cabin fever, to get you up and out. I also helped my dad babysit my little bubba's Saturday night and it was lovely to spend time with them #my2favouritepeople

So here's to a better week. As we draw a close on October, let's get ready for a great November. Especially as the eggnog latte, should be in Starbucks soon.

Have a great day, remember you are a unicorn and don't let anybody shit on your rainbow 💗

37 Years Young

So it's official, I'm now 37 😃

Photo by ASHLEY EDWARDS on Unsplash

I actually didn't mind turning 37. I'm grateful to be able to add another year to my life. A luxury not extended to so many.

Upon turning 30, I assumed, by the time I was this close to the big 4 0, I’d at the very least be married and either have or be onto my second child. As it turns out, I'm as far away from that actuality as England is from Australia.

I expected this reality to cause me to feel mountains of dread as I rolled into this birthday. However, I actually feel more at peace with the way life has turned out than I thought possible. I'm filled with  less panic about not walking the path I’d imagined for myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm not ruling out the husband, 2 kids and pet fish (I’d like to think I could it could be a dog, but I still haven’t quite got my head around picking up poop with a plastic bag yet). I’m simply allowing room for a different possibility of happily ever after.

With that being said, I wasn’t 100% sure, that as another birthday approached and me still having no real idea of where my future was heading, that I wouldn’t be on the sofa wrapped in a fleece blanket, knocking back the  Prosecco, whilst shoveling down a Red Velvet cake getting through as many  romcoms and Disney films as I could  manage before my eyes were to puffy to open from all of the ugly crying. Thankfully, that’s not how it turned out. 

I was however, in bed for over week with a stupid ass viral infection. As much as I got to catch up on KUWTK, it also meant I had to lay waste to my celebratory plans. I managed to get to my annual daddy daughter birthday lunch. But paid the price, by getting caught in the rain and therefore getting even sicker. Over the last 10 days I've gone from feeling achy and dizzy, to snot nosed and sneezy, to vomiting with high temperatures. Not the way I’d hoped to spend the first week of being 37, but as they say “Shit Happens”. The universe clearly had other plans for me.

I'm happy to report, I’m now feeling better and am  back on fighting form and looking forward to getting the next year of my life off of the ground. I started this blog because I love writing and wanted to see if I could create something I was passionate about and document my journey to living my best life. “I want more from life” than I've had up until now. Since starting this blog the biggest lesson I’ve learned is, that my better life starts with me. Over the last 6 months there has been many ups and downs. There’s been times I thought I was getting worse rather than better. There’s been mistakes and lessons. There’s been trying new things and doing things differently as well as understanding more about my emotions and the effects they have on my decisions. But it’s all led to me feeling positive about moving forward.

A big part of that is realising that I need to start enjoying life more. Yes, I want to lose weight. Yes, I want to be physically, mentally and emotionally stronger,  Yes, I want to drink differently to the way I have been and Yes, I want to get more from life. But along the way of obtaining all of this, I forgot about actually enjoying myself. I’d forgotten that as much as I want to strive to get my shit together, I can’t get lost in that. I need to remember to enjoy the small moments like creating a Christmas Jazz playlist on spotify. Or finding a new way to prop up my pillows in bed to relax more when watching TV or reading. Or even finding out Nandos now deliver to my house. So for the next couple of weeks the mantra is “ENJOY” Keep working on being better, but learn how to enjoy the process.....and life!


Goals for a October

• Enjoy Life

• Morning Yoga 

• Detox

• Pinterest (Searching for Pins make me happy 

• Be Present

Have a great day, remember you are a unicorn and don't let anybody shit on your rainbow 💓